How far can YOU get?

During last weeks NFC championship game, a bunch of friends and I were hanging out drinking when our friend Dorothy mentioned her obsession with the online date simulator. She added that she hadn't been able to get passed 2nd base. Yes, just as you are right now, I was immediately intrigued.

The first things out of my mouth of course were "Do you guys have a laptop with wireless?" Oh and did they ever!


Basically, you start off peeping in the window (creepy, but I've done it before) at your date who is waiting for you. The game consists of clicking different areas of the screen in order to progress. Different options lead to a different date all with the goal of..... Wait for it......... a sweet hot night of craZy sex with a capital Z.

If I sound creepy or desperate it's because you haven't tried it yet. Honestly, the girls were more interested in it then the guys (possibly because one of the greatest football games of the year was on). What was funny is that every dude was like, "I going to bag her on my first try." But as most people know it's not that easy. In the game it takes a careful balance of alcohol, food, dancing and truth or dare. Do we go for a swim? Hot tub? Maybe a nice drive? So many choices, so little battery life.

On my first date I also got to second base but I over did it with the whisky and she ended up passing out on the table. This was nice because in real life it's usually me.

My friend Maryanne went if for the boob grope WAY too soon and got an early end to the night. My girlfriend got dissed when according to Ariane, she ate too much of the stake. Fatty.

The highlight for me was when another friend decided to go for the casual gentlemen approach and take Ariane on a drive. And then stop for gas. And then stop for supplies. And then more driving. Then to a nice lookout. Then more driving. After that Ariane told him then that she was tired and going home. Brilliant! The most boring and disappointing dates aren't just for real life.

Well, go ahead and try it out. It's free but might not be suitable for work because if you're lucky there is some nudity. Just so you know though, I totally scored on my second try. She succumbed to my nerdy manliness.